i had too much to drink, and i didn't think, i didn't think of you...

i'm a wee bit tipsy still, and thus, a bit belligerent so bear with me...

do you ever have those defining moments in your life, where you can go back to a certain situation and clearly pick out the exact moment something changed the entire thing? i realized tonight, i have had one of those moments concerning a few relationships in present life. relationships that have changed, for the better or worse i do not know, or maybe just don't wish to recognize, but still, ones that nonetheless have changed; and i can trace those changes back to a specific moment...a specific time where something happened and something was said or done...not always just one specific thing, but sometimes an entire domino effect of occurrences.

okay, now i'm just rambling.

i don't know what to do about it. i don't know how to make things better, or make them right, or change them again in some other way to set them on some different course.

it's not the change the scares or bothers me...it's what that change has led, and will lead to...where it will steer those relationships...how they'll be shaped because of it, and the lost possibility of where they were originally headed. lament...i suppose.

sometimes being drunk helps...