now look here motivator...

ah...you gotta love 'r' rated movies on t.v. and how they choose to edit the naughty words. it can almost make a really bad movie like 'resident evil 2' entertaining. almost...

anyway, moving on.

i have been so productive lately, and in such a good mood. i think i really needed this time off from work and school to get things in my life re-situated and to just generally take a break. sometimes we all need a break, and i don't just mean from work or school, or whatever our day to day lives entail. i mean, there are times when we really need a *real* break. a break from life. from the things, the people, the places and everything else that brings us down and adds to the load of living in general. for me, it's not something that i realize happens until i get a break from it all, and have the time and peace of mind to push back and look at things from a wider perspective. i have the ability to tell people no, and to not committ to something out of guilt or stress. i have the time to work on the projects that i *want* to work on and don't *have* to work on. and on the flip side, if i don't work on them there are no consequences or negative backlash to fear.

on a side note, and before i get negative backlash for this post (which is ridiculous that i might, but nevertheless), i am not saying that friends or family are bad for us, or me, or whomever. however, i do stand by the statement that the people in one's life can bring them down after a period of time, whether they mean to or not. there are times when the best of intentions have the worst impacts or results. people can become so blinded by their love or compassion for a person that they don't take the time to think about how something they think they are doing to help will effect the person in the end. evolution is a natural part of life, and we as humans must continue to evolve to survive, and sometimes this means by evolving the people around us as well. if we kept the same people close to us without ever having any sort of variety or change, we would stop growing and evolving because our enviroment will have become stagnate. that is not to say that we must dump people from our lives after a period of time, however it is to say that we must be aware of when we have reached a point of stagnation, and then do something about it.
people change...people *need* to change, and those around us need to allow for that change in ourselves and in others. and yes, because of such, relationships change as well, and that is something that we all need to accept. if you try to hold on to the past, or to what a relationship *used to be* you will never be able to move past it. and trust me, you need to move past it. you cannot go on holding others to your expectations of a role that they used to hold in your life. move on...let it go...because damn, it's just not worth it. if you can't do it for them, do it for yourself, (or vise versa), because if you don't, you are wasting life, time and energy that could be used towards something more productive and positive.
now i know it probably sounds like i'm just preaching, but after holding on to a past relationship for a hell of a lot longer than i should have, i speak from experience. the fact that i love someone will never change, but i am not going to allow myself to not move on because of that love, or to hold that person to a role they once held. time changes everything and everyone, and usually for the better.

this probably didn't help the fact that it will piss some people off, but i don't think that i really care. feel free to voice your opposing opinions all you want, but know that you will be jacking your jaw to a deaf ear. not that i'm trying to be shitty, not in the least bit. everyone is entitled to their opinion, and i'm sure you all have your own, which i'm glad you do, but i just don't want to hear it. this is mine opinion, and since it's my blog, i have the right to voice my opinion, just as you have the right to not read it.

with all of that being said, i am off to continue being productive for the day and getting things taken care of. later motivator!

=e