the much dreaded, stereo-typical new years eve post...

ok, so last year i wasn't all into this whole, making resolutions crap as you can plainly see here.

however, this year is different. why? i don't know, it just is! so bear with me as i put this all out on the table and sort through it publicly.

My New Years Resolutions

1. to freaking complete my damned associates degree by the end of the year, as well as figure out where i'm going from there! this should be completely attainable, regardless of how many of you don't believe i can take on 16 hours this semester! :P

2. lose 10-15 pounds in the next six months. again, completely attainable, but would you all please stop telling me i don't need to? really? i think i know what's best for my body ;)

3. to pay off my credit card and keep it that way. it's not really that bad, but it does tend to stress me out a bit.

4. to decorate and organize our new place over the next year, and have everything unpacked by the beginning of fall semester! i like this place, and i don't really want to move again til we buy a house somewhere.

5. to be more cooperative in therapy. i mean, hell, i pay for it, i might as well get something out of it!

6. to focus more on my art, and stop letting logic get in the way of it. it's the only way it will ever be worth anything, and i don't mean monetarily.

ok...i think that's enough resolutions. i think they are all very reasonable...now it's just a test of my will.

as for the rest of my life, everything is going well. rob and i got back from our trip on thursday, and while we had a wonderful time, we were both very ready to be home. the weather was gorgeous most of the trip, with only one night of rain and snow! i would have liked to have seen more snow, but i was glad to not have to drive in it honestly. the kitties were very glad to have us back, and they both have been very needy.
as for christmas, it was awesome all the way around. i was really glad to get to spend time with rob's family again. they are all such wonderful people! they make me feel so welcome and they even call me aunt to the kiddos. speaking of which, rob's youngest nephew, noah, has grown so much, and is now walking everywhere and jabbering up a storm! he's so adorable!
anyway. there is much more to post about on the trip however, i think i'm ready for some wine and quality time with my baby. hope everyone has a safe and wonderful new years eve and day! don't drink too much!

much love,

=e

you can't see the forest for the trees...

i had to go up to the lab today to do some printing for an exhibition i'm in come january. i had done some test prints last week to pick out the images i was going to use and see if there were any real problems with the negatives and what not. now i have the task of printing them full size, about 9" x 12", on fiber-based paper with no dust spots, scratches, or most importantly, printing errors. i don't do digital prints, this is all wet-lab printing mind you.
well, all fine and dandy and what not. but i was getting frustrated today because i really just wasn't motivated to print and felt a bit rushed, for no other reason than my own really, and things just weren't clicking as usual. however, the straw that broke the camels back was when i went and showed a test page to kelley and des to just vent about the problems i was running into. so i'm explaining to them how it's too light and whatnot, and i grab the test print i had done last week to kind of use as an example, but made sure to point out that the test print itself was not printed well (thus not being the purpose of a test print) and was too dark. however, they both immediately start exclaiming how they love the test print and how cool it looks and stuff. i tried to explain that it's not a good print and it's not right, but they both were relentless in their efforts to tell me that i should still print it that way, and as one of them stated, "since you know it's wrong, you can do it purposefully because that's artistic freedom."
i was infuriated.
i still am infuriated.
not at them, just at that concept.
doing something wrong is *not* artistic freedom no matter if you meant to do it or not. plain and simple, it's just wrong! there are techniques and skills that one can use to create effects in a technically correct way that should by all means be considered 'artistic freedom'. however, printing something too dark is not one of them! that's just bad printing!!!
now, a lot of people wouldn't think that this was something to get so upset about, however there is a professor at the school where i attend and work that pushes this whole 'as long as you meant to do it, it's artistic expression/freedom' bullshit! all of her classes are based around 'concept' and 'imagery' and 'expression', yet it comes to no suprise to me when none of her students can print worth a damn by the end of the semester. perhaps if she spent more time teaching the technical aspects of photography and printing, her students 'artistic expressions' wouldn't look like something my cats puked up on a bad day.
i was fortunate enough to have taken a professor that gets and respects and understands the need for technical education. with photography, or any art for that matter, everything comes second to the technique used to create it. a strong concept can fall flat if it looks like shit. poor printing and technique detracts so much from a picture or any art for that matter. anyone with any kind of knowledge will immediately start picking apart all of the mistakes and short comings of a piece if you leave them out there for the world to see. i just can't comprehend how anyone could see poor technique as 'artistic freedom'. it boggles my mind.

ok. the soap box is put away. i'll be fine. just needed to vent.

in other news, half of my christmas is already over. i had my family get together saturday and my friend's get together sunday and both were a blast. the family was interesting as always, but that was to be expected. having all of my friends over was absolutely awesome though! rob and i made tons of food and snacks and des, kelley and jamie came over and we all just hung out and chatted and did the gift thing! i hope you all had a good time! and thank you for everything! :D
alrighty, well i've worn myself out today so i'm going to head to bed methinks. i've gotta get up early tomorrow and go to the lab for a full day of printing! catch y'all later!

=e

after the flood all the colors came out...

have i mentioned how much i love u2? cause it's a lot.
so last night was...well...i'm gonna have to go with just weird. i dunno. luckily i was on darvocet so i'm a bit foggy on the details, and i'm thinking that's probably best. i just have that overcast feeling today. ya know, when you feel like you've got this huge cloud of regret and confusion hanging over you? yeah. just kinda heavy.

uh, so yeah, anyway. i have a busy day ahead of me and i guess i should stop trying to avoid it now. so shower time it is followed by going to the lab to print, then staying there to work, then home to change, and off to a company christmas party. oh joy. alright. later.

=e

always remember...

wow, i've been busy lately. with the semester coming to an end, school and work have been extremely hectic, not to mention all the things i'm having to do outside of work and school. crazy crazy craziness. but it's all good.

as far as christmas shopping goes, i think i'm pretty much done. we have a couple of random things to go get for rob's nephews and such, but other than that i'm personally done. now i've just got the daunting task ahead of me of wrapping everything! actually, it's more like getting rob to wrap everything...he does such a nice job! and then i'll decorate the packages and i'm making name tags/cards for them because that's just me and my crafty self. the christmas friend get-together got postponed til the 17th, which actually works out well since jamie will be able to come and i don't have to rush on cleaning, unpacking and finishing the painting i'm giving to kelley. speaking of which, i actually found all my paints today and set up my art table and easel and started working on her painting again. w00t. i'm productive! :)

so currently the menu for the get together is as follows:
chicken tenders
apple fritters
soft gingerbread cookies
pumpkin pie
small things like cheese and crackers
queso dip and chips
and then i figure if we want real food we can just order pizza or something.
and yes, i'm cooking all of that! i'm so excited, i love to cook and have people over!!! we just haven't done it in so long, so i'm going all out! so none of y'all better cancel on me dagnabit!!! :P

i'm wasting time currently while paint dries on kelley's painting so i can go put a wash on it and see whether or not i'm going to call it done. knowing me i probably won't, but we'll see! so in the meantime, hmm...what else is going on...uhm...yeah, not a lot. we have rob's company christmas party this friday, christmas with my family on saturday, and christmas with my friends on sunday...busy weekend! on top of that i have two finals this week and therapy on wednesday. and then next week starts wintermester which i have to pay for by wednesday. wow, december has just been a very busy and expensive month i'm coming to realize. however, i've been in such a good mood lately, that i can hardly complain about anything. i haven't felt real great physically, but emotionally and mentally i've felt fantastic! i've been very productive and high spirited, which is pretty out of the ordinary for me. it's like i go the opposite of the rest of the world. most everyone else i know gets all mopey and depressed around the holidays...holiday blues if you will, and i go the other way, where i'm usually fairly up and motivated. if nothing else it will make for an interesting session on wednesday. i've decided i'm just going to put together a photo album and take it with me to therapy and we'll go through that so she has a face to put with names or something.
anyway. enough jibber jabbering, i've gotta go do that wash on the painting so i'll catch y'all later!
much love everyone!

=e

shhhh...be vewy vewy quiet...i'm huntin' wabbits...

so, it's been a few days. not much to talk about really. this week has been a bit hectic, but not too terribly bad or anything. i just finished up my second paper for my bcis class which i have to go to a little later, and then come home and write a paper for none other than my racquetball class. that shouldn't be too hard though. the bcis papers weren't hard either, i just didn't really want to do them.
des had knee surgery on monday. she's doing well, but is in some pain, which is completely understandable and expected. i went over to see her yesterday and hung out for awhile. i felt bad leaving because she was in so much pain because the pain killers had worn off, and i know how much that totally blows dogs for quarters. she called a little later once i was home and we chatted for a bit. i had told her i would set aside my hatred for talking on the phone just for her because she was in so much pain, and then i missed her call because i was in the bath, and i had to call her back.
so i just realized that this post has turned into a bit of rambling. so let's continue... :D
i'm almost all done with christmas shopping...finally!!!! i was so sure i would have it all done by now, but i ran into a couple of road-blocks. however, i now have those figured out, and it's just a matter of getting the time to finish all this stuff and be done with it. we're having christmas with my mom and family on the 16th since we'll be in indiana with rob's family on christmas day. i was really glad it worked out so that my family could all get together early. i need to figure out when we all (my friends, or those of you that read this) can all get together and have our christmas. kelley and i were talking yesterday about it, and figured the 12th might be good, however i realized last nite that jamie will have class that nite and probably wouldn't be able to come, and that's just no good. but i just don't know of another time to do it, so we'll see. i'm planning on making a bunch of food and being unpacked by that time, so hopefully it will all work out.
okie dokie, well i need to go eat and shower before class. catch you homies later!

=e

just because it's cool...

Your results:
You are Superman

Superman 80% Spider-Man 80% Batman 70% The Flash 60% Green Lantern 60% Robin 57% Hulk 55% Supergirl 52% Iron Man 45% Wonder Woman 37% Catwoman 35%

You are mild-mannered, good, strong and you love to help others.

Click here to take the "Which Superhero are you?" quiz...

a post having absolutely nothing to do with thanksgiving...

ahwile back, a little over a week ago, someone called me 'judgmental'. well, i guess a few people have called me that, however, i'm just now hearing about it through the grape-vine...and then the grape-vine itself called me judgmental as well. now, i've always considered myself a fairly open-minded, and, well, non-judgmental person, so i was a bit perplexed by such statements.
amazed by this accusation, i came home to my boyfriend of three years and asked him whether or not he viewed me as a judgmental person. his answer? 'not really.' when asked for further explanation he elaborated that he doesn't see me as judgmental really, but more that i'm a very intuitive person that's rarely wrong, and that knows what she will and will not put up with in people. personally, i couldn't agree with this more.
i've always had a very concrete set of core values, and while i am very well aware of the fact that i cannot expect others to fully subscribe to, nor conform their lives to those same set of core values, i do have a tendancy to not put up with too much that falls outside of what i believe to be acceptable.
for example: one of my strongest values is that, for me, drugs are wrong. i have never used drugs (ever), i never will use drugs, and i do not put up with people that use drugs. however, among those that i call friends are some people that have used drugs to various extents. do i think any less of these people? no. do i think that i am better than they for having not done something i believe is wrong? absolutely not. we're just different people that chose different paths. we've each had different experiences that make us who we are, and just because that's part of their experience does not mean that i am going to love them any less. however, if someone that's currently a part of my life gets involved with drugs to an extent that disrupts their lives, i will attempt to get them help once or twice, and if that doesn't work then i wash my hands of them completely, allowing them to continue leading their own lives and making their own decisions whatever they may be. it's not that i all of a sudden think they are a bad person, i just don't want that in my own life.
so why is it then that i was called judgmental? it pretty much stays in theme with the drug issue. because i refuse to accept certain people into my life because of the choices they make and the behavior they display, i have been labelled as a 'narrow-minded, judgmental bitch'. seems to me i'm not the one being judgmental in that statement, but that's just getting into semantics.
so i looked up the definition of the word judgmental, and if you go to www.m-w.com you will find that it states:

Main Entry: judg·men·tal
Pronunciation: "j&j-'men-t&l
Function: adjective
1 : of, relating to, or involving judgment
2 : characterized by a tendency to judge harshly

to judge harshly? i honestly don't believe i fall into that category. i will say that i do know what i like and what i don't like, and i do know what i will put up with and what i won't put up with. so if that is 'to judge harshly' then so be it, but i don't believe it is really. i never said anyone was wrong or going to hell, i only ever said it was wrong for me and that i didn't want it in my life. i personally prefer the term 'intuitively selective', but that's just me. i don't know, maybe this whole post confirms that i am a judgmental person. i hope it doesn't, but i guess it very well could. it's up for interpretation i suppose, however, when it comes down to it, if you are going to call me judgmental, at least have the balls to say it to my face.

the phone only rings when you're not there to answer it...

hey look, an actual blog post! w00t!
yeah, i'm lame...so what.

well, since the last post here's what's been going on:

rob and i had our 3 year anniversary...how did we celebrate you ask? we moved. so now we're at the new place with boxes piled everywhere. there's still some stuff at the old place, but hopefully that'll get moved this week.
what else...hm...oh, i'm sick. sunday i lost my voice completely and have continued feeling like shit. we went to the store late friday night and bought $20 worth of medicine and stuff, but i can't say that any of it has helped at all. i need to go get some zicam, or so says everyone around me. maybe i'll go do that today.
that's about it really. i know, pretty boring for a week of no posts, but what can ya expect? i work and go to school, that's it really.

i do have rant, however, that i feel the need to share...
i know what you're thinking, "when do you *not* have a rant?" i know i know, but humor me...

i do not understand people having blogs and/or myspace pages, yet posting things on private where people cannot read them. what's the point? if you don't want anyone to read it, write it somewhere where it's not going to show up for the world to see in the first place! otherwise it kind of defeats the purpose of having the blog! i dunno. i'm annoyed with people and their myspace behaviors. then again, myspace annoys me anyway, so what should i expect.

ok, rant done...for now. i'm at work the day before the school closes for thanksgiving break, and i'm bored out of my mind. there are three people signed in and they're in three different places. one's in the studio, one in the digital lab, and one in here processing film. yeah...boring. i had a really good conversation with the new guy this morning. he's from israel and has a lot of interesting stories, so we talked for about an hour and a half. then a student showed up and he had to go, so now i'm back to being bored. anyway, i guess i'm going to go do something somewhat productive. i'm supposed to be cleaning the alt. lab, so after a restroom break i may look into that. everyone have a safe holiday and i'll see ya!

=e

i cranked it up to nine just to see how high it was...

so tomorrow we sign the lease and get the keys to the new place. yay!
btw...packing sucks.

not a lot else going on.

caramel apple cider from starbucks is fucking orgasmic. yeah, you heard me.

i have nothing to do other than packing since i just got done packing up the rest of my art supplies. i am sad. not really, just lazy and hate packing.

i'm freaking exhausted. rob is too. he just came in here all sad puppy like and said, "i need to be done with this" meaning packing. i can't blame him. i do too.
in fact, i think i am. later.

=e

a doucebag and a turd sandwich...

haha, we still have the same governor! that's awesome.
sorry. i'm not republican or anything. in fact, i'm not anything really. i just think it's hilarious that all i've heard all week is how pissed off people are that perry is still the gov. i just want to smack people and say, "what the fuck did you expect??? it's texas!!!"
i mean really people, come on. we're a red state. there is no denying nor changing that. and i get that the man didn't even get majority vote, but it's not like the rest of you all got on the same page or anything.
and i love, i mean i *love* the fact that kinky came in dead last. i mean, for real, even the grandma who most people hadn't heard about beat him out!!! *that* makes me smile :D

it's not like i'm for one more than the other or anything really. i don't vote. most people say to me, 'then you don't have a right to complain when the shit hits the fan' and i couldn't agree more. however, the shit will hit the fan regardless of who's in office. i'm just not going to be held responsible for putting whatever doucebag there. plus, i like to stay as uneducated as possible on politics and the horrible state of our country/world. ignorance is bliss.

ok, so that's all i got really. i'm currently varnishing some paintings so that they don't get screwed up in the move, which is next week! yay! i finally started throwing stuff into piles today for packing purposes. hopefully it will all get done. we'll see.
oh, i found a new artist i really like. his name is sean scully. check him out!! he's a lot like rothko, which would explain why i like him.
alrighty, back to varnishing. later!

=e

everything in moderation...

thus far, this has been the week from hell. a true test of my patience and sanity, which were waning at the beginning of the week already.
without getting too much into it here, the brief overview is: everything kind of exploded on monday, all at once, in a matter of an hour, and then continued to deteriorate the rest of the week. like nuclear fall out. or the terminator...it will not stop until you are dead!
it's 2:30 in the morning and i've been up painting for awhile now. it's all crap. every laast bit of it, but i still continue to do it. it's the only thing i really do.
wow, this post went downhill really quick didn't it. huh. i should watch that more closely in the future.
on a more positive note (sort of), i saw my ex on monday, and all i have to say is...wow. if i ever need to feel better about myself and my life that should do it. he happened to be at a lecture/ gallery reception that the photography chair that i work with was giving over at another local college and had invited me to. poor guy, i almost feel badly for him, but then i just chalk it up to karma because it was bound to happen sooner or later. someone asked me the other day if i hate him. you would think i would. i have every single right to hate him for the things he did to me, the things he put me through, and the way he treated me. however, i could never hate him. he is one screwed up individual, that's for damn sure, but i spent two years with him, and i would like to think, at least, that i stayed because there was something good there. and there are times that i can remember being very happy that i was sharing my life with him. unfortunately, those times are extremely fogged over by the rest of the times that were not so grand, and that's why i have no regrets for no longer being with him. i have moved on and found an amazing guy that cares deeply about me and treats me with so much respect and love that i thank him every day for being a part of my life. i was really lucky to find such an awesome person after finding so many that weren't, and i in no way take that for granted.
okie doke. soap box is put away now. i should probably think about heading to bed. i need to get up and call the dentist early tomorrow and maybe think about packing up some stuff. we move next week! yay!
alrighty. nite!

=e

...

game over...

something for the moment...

there is not much going on in life these days. i'm currently up at work, bored out of my skull, waiting for the new guy to get here, and trying to find some form of entertainment in the meantime.
i have been reading a book that was referred to me by a friend/professor. it's titled, 'art and fear'. it's a really great book about how artists who ever really do anything get there by confronting their fears and accepting the fact that they will never be the 'perfect' artist, etc etc etc... i'm really enjoying it actually. it all kinda came about because i had brought some paintings up to work to show to a couple of people that had been harassing me about them for awhile. so after that, the one friend who recommended the book emailed me saying i should take some different art classes, etc. i responded explaining that i had entertained the idea for a brief moment, but that my fear of putting too much out there and people seeing what's really there has kept me from really pursuing it. her being my photography prof. was well aware of this holding me back and thus recommended the book.
long story with not much pay off, i know.
anyway, the book, and the conversation with my friends and what not, has really left me kind of confused and turned around as of late. all i've been doing with my free-time for the past couple months or so is paint. i haven't payed much attention to school, work, or friends. i haven't worked on any of my photography projects that i truly care about. i don't know. i think a lot of it has to do with the fact that i didn't take a photography class this semester and it's really thrown me off balance. i need that creative output, and the push of assignments that make me spend time being creative in order to balance out everything else i have to do in the semester. when i'm left to my own devices, very little, or nothing at all gets done, and i'm left with a gpa falling nearly as quickly as my mood and motivation. ok, so no necessarily true, but almost. i guess i've been trying to compensate for that lack of creative push by spending all my free time painting in order to get that out of me, however it really hasn't been enough. i'm not really sure where i was going with all of this. perhaps that painting, photography, writing, art in general, it's all a great outlet, but not a great solution.
anyway. in about an hour that same friend and i are going to play racquetball which i am thouroughly looking forward to, tho my knees are not. however, they'll get over it. other than that, not much else is going on really. i'm loving the colder weather as it does bring some uplifting whatever into my otherwise non-uplifting life.
hope all is well in the world with everyone else. more later i'm sure.

=e

a great song by 'portastatic'

'through with people'

I guess I'm through with people
I can just take less and less
Point your fingers, make a steeple
I'll be your hymnal in your church of lonliness
The transition was so easy, no announcements or asking
My silence was golden
My silence was free
And all this talking is taxing me

So let the sun set on this paper shade
Let me get some sleep in this bed
That I made it this far
Well I made it this far
And I'll give all the lousy credit
To anyone who wants it
If they'd just let me lower the bar

I guess I'm through with people
I say let's call it a wash
Clean like a pickup on Friday
Stubborn like a pile of rocks

I don't have to care I couldn't like you less
And I don't have to care about that thin cotton dress
I could put my drink down and walk away
It's a simple solution
To a complicated maze
I just remembered that I'm through with people today

I'm through with people

fleischfarben...

it's late, and i'm exhausted...don't expect this to mean much or make very much sense.

happy halloween fuckers.
i spent mine hanging with friends, good food, weird music, and doing too much driving for my particular tastes. however, it was still pretty cool.
i never knew there was such a thing as too much black light, but trust me, there is.

aside from that, i am still just really run down this week. i dont know what's going on, but it's like i can't sleep enough. i came home last nite and went to sleep at 8p.m. then woke up at 11:00p.m. and went back to sleep at 1a.m. til i got up at 9:30a.m. i dunno. just absolutely worn out.
luckily we didn't have to play in racquetball today since we had mid-term review. yes, we have a mid-term in that class. we also have to write a paper. like...actually write a paper. i think it's pretty funny. other than that, i haven't been to a single class this week. guess i'll have to remedy that tomorrow though. bio lecture is just so damn boring though, and bcis makes me flat out angry. just thinkin about that class gets me riled up.

ok, well i'm literally drooling on myself i'm so tired, so i think i'm going to head to bed now. hope everyone's having a good week. catch ya later.

-e

warning: do not install backwards...

so apparently the time change was this weekend. i know i was told about it, but i'll be damned if i remembered it. so now i'm a bit screwed up, but that's ok. it'll work itself out. just may take a couple of days of weird sleep til it does.
anyway.
i'm sitting here with paint all over my hands, desk and keyboard because all i've really been doing this weekend is, well, painting. i started and finished two new ones, and have started working on one that i started a long time ago and felt differently about now. it's definitely heading in a better direction now. i don't think i can call it done yet, but probably not too much longer. we'll see. i've really started to experiment with colors and layers and stuff. the last three i've done i really like, so it can't be all bad i spose. i really need to get everything finished up and varnished before we move in a couple of weeks. which reminds me...
we move in two and a half weeks!!! yay!!!!!! this makes me very happy because i am so ready for a change. i've found myself not caring about too much lately, and i think a change in scenery will be good for me. it'll give me something to do if nothing else. plus, i really like decorating, which is so totally girly of me, but i can't help it, it's the artsy fartsy side of me really.
let's see...what else. oh, i ordered one of rob's christmas presents the other day. i know it's early, but i figured i'd better get it before it went out of stock again, and that way i don't have to worry about getting it in time and stuff. so, yeah...sweet.
lately i've really been digging the band 'blue october'. i really liked them when they first came about a few years ago, but then they kinda faded away, and it wasn't until recently that i really started to hear them again. they are quite a good band, and most of their lyrics are meaningful which is important seeing as how most bands these days think it's just about being 'different' or 'the same' or whatever. music has a way of pissing me off because of it's suckage level, however this band usually rises above that level, which few rarely do.
wow, i'm tired.
alrighty, well that's my cue to cut this off and say fare-the-well. so, later punks!

-e

yeeeeeeeeeah...

i was sitting here earlier, and realized just how messy my desk is. it's not something i really had to "realize" i guess, but it really just hit me at that moment. and so i took a few pictures of it, some of which i will now share with you...

keep all counter tops clean...

this is extremely cool...
that is, if you're into learning interesting things.

no real post or update to give at this point. same ole same ole. school, work, sleep. i'm currently at work and no one is here, go figure. 8p.m. on a friday night...i wonder where everyone could be?! oh wait, that's right...people actually have lives. i don't. not that i'm complaining at all. in fact, i thoroughly enjoy not having that kind of hectic schedule of going out all the time, and always having plans and crap. i realized long ago that by not doing all that typical teenager-to-twenty something party crap, i could actually accomplish things in my own life such as my art, and the piles of laundry that accumulate over time. :) not that either of those things really have much to do with the other.
ok, so obviously i'm on darvocet which has hindered my ability to think and/or type clearly, so i'm going to go back to my boring friday night at work. enjoy the weekend everyone.

-e

intended for single use only...

wow i'm tired. today was nothing out of the ordinary really, but for some reason i am absolutely exhausted. there were two highlights to my day:

1. i got in an arguement with my bcis professor...well, technically, he got into an arguement with me since he started it by treating me like i was some teenager in high school. i ended up having to explain to him that i pay to be there, and that i will not be disrespected that way by professor as unorganized as himself. i mean, the man teaches out of a cardboard box! it takes him twenty minutes at the beginning of every class to find everything he needs in order to actually start class. it's a complete waste of my time to show up, and so monday i didn't, and he felt the need to inquire as to why i wasn't there in front of everyone. when i explained to him that it was none of his business he then asked why i showed up today, to which i responded, "do you want me to leave?" he then made some comment about how if i'm going to show up i can't just sit there and talk. for any of you that know me, you must realize how absurd this statement is. i'm completely anti-social and speak to almost no one unless prompted to. that's when i said what i said, and he tucked his tail between his legs and shut up. it was a shining moment for me. especially when everyone else in class was behind me for it.

the second highlight for the day really pales in comparison to that, however, it was a highlight for me because i've really been too lazy and apathetic to do it until today.

2. i finally got my hair cut. i seriously needed it, and am extremely glad to have gotten it done and out of the way. of course i'll need to get it cut again in a month or so, but why worry about that now? exactly.

ok well, the boyfriend is waiting for me to play video games with him downstairs, so i'd better go before i get too tired to do so. have a great rest of the week!

-e

a wicked mega hit that delivers twice the buzz...

today was a freaking awesome day! rob and i joined the rec center this morning and played a nearly full set of racquetball! it was so much fun and rob really enjoyed it which makes me extremely happy! we're planning on playing every saturday after i get off of work and then sunday's as well! yea!!!!!!!
after we got done playing we came home, showered and then went to lunch at souper salad which was just delicious! then we headed to target for a few things we needed, and then it was home for nap time! the rest of our day has been pretty laid back. there was dinner and vh1 shows, and we went to the store around 10:30p.m. for groceries. now i'm just chillin here after my bath and rob is playing a yoshi game on his comp.
i took a benadryl a little bit ago so i don't think i'll be up too much longer. that stuff hits me like a ton of bricks, and that's only taking half of a dosage. i will definitely be sleeping hard tonite.
i have a couple of projects i'm working on currently. most of them are still in brainstorming stages, but will probably be moving forward more quickly once this week picks up.
i was supposed to do laundry today, and that didn't happen at all. now it's after midnite and i haven't even done a single load. ah well, i'll get around to it eventually i suppose.
ok, so i just noticed that when rob was in my room installing stuff on my computer he posed one of my undertaker toys and i took a picture because i felt the need to share. the picture is crap, but just done for entertainment purposes. so on that note i will leave you with this picture and bid you a goodnite.

-e

don't want to live forever this way, but it's gonna have to do for today...

today was my first saturday where i got out of work at 2:30p.m. and had the rest of the afternoon to be with rob and do stuff! it was so exactly what i needed. we hung out for a bit, then decided to go check out the rec center over by the school and see about memberships and stuff, then we headed to the store for milk, and then we went to the movies and saw 'man of the year'. the movie wasn't that good really, but just the entire day was a really nice change.
oh, and i made photograms while brian did some printing in the wet lab this morning. it was completely cheesey and stupid, but it was still fun. then this evening we went to starbucks and then to michael's where i got, i think 12 new canvas' for painting, then we hung out and had personal time, then we ate dinner and watched this week's smallville episode which was just incredible! i love it when they just completely geek out and go all comic book with the storylines.
tomorrow is slated to be another good day as well. i have some laundry to do so that i can actually have clean clothes for the week. then we're going back over to the rec center and signing up for memberships and will probably play a full set of racquetball (which is why we want to join in the first place). we bought rob some gear the other day and he's really excited about it, which rocks because i've been trying to find something that we can do together and isn't dependent on the weather, like tennis or biking, etc...
other than that, not much else to report on. i guess since i have all of this new canvas i will be painting sometime in the near future. i did finish another painting last nite. it's *a lot* different that most of my other stuff, but i really like it. it's all about time...oooo, i know, this one actually has meaning, and i'm willing to admit it...imagine that. :) it's a growing thing i guess. anyway. well rob is waiting for me to come cuddle, so i'm off for the nite. enjoy your respective weekends people. later!

-e

and I forget the rest of me...

just a general update here. nothing too interesting or profound, so don't get your hopes up.

this week i was finally able to end my search for a new hoodie. i didn't only end the search, i dropped a ten ton weight on it. i am now the proud owner of three very cool zip up hoodies. i got one lightweight hoodie that's a maroon color, a medium weight hoodie that's green, and a heavier weight hoodie that's brown. yay me! also this week i got a new pair of shoes. they're grey vans that were on clearance and that i got for even less than the clearance price because one of the shoes was missing a shoe-lace, so i negotiated the price and got an additional 15% off. i could have pushed for 20%, but the lady was real nice about it, and i hate being a pushy bitch of a customer. oh! when i got my new hoodies i also got two new beanies that are awesome!

work is going ok. the boss man and i are on neutral terms currently, so that's cool. there's not really a lot to report on there, so i'll move on.
uhm...i was going to move on to the topic of school, but that's pretty much the same situation as work, so yeah...

in the past week it has been pointed out to me that i use the terms "sure", "indeeed" (purposefully mispelled because that's how i say it), and "i don't know" quite often throughout the day. now, personally i don't see the problem with this. i view all three of these terms as universal, interchangeable terms that can work in most situations by someone that knows how to properly use them in those situations...someone like me. however, from what i gather, it seems to be problematic to others. perhaps it's the indifference that can be conveyed through them at certain times, or maybe it's that people don't always know what i mean by them, but when it comes down to it, isn't that the point of saying something to that effect? seems to me to be. if ya think about it, that's probably why i use them so often. go figure.

well i haven't done much painting lately. i have started a new one just earlier tonite, however, i have been at a lack for inspiration as of late. i don't know, we'll see where it goes. i have some ideas for a couple of photography projects i want to work on, but i'm having a hard time finding the motivation to work on those either. i've written them out and brainstormed on them a bit, bought film and whatnot, but i don't know...it's just whatever. it'll get done at some point if it's important enough i suppose.

huh...well look at that. it's amazing how someone can message you one message and cause inspiration to spark out of nowhere. i'm off...later.

-e

linkage...

this site has been a favorite of mine for quite some time. i don't remember how i came across it, or if maybe i've even posted it in some past blog post, but i happened to come across the link again today buried away in my mass of favorites, and decided to share it with anyone who reads this.
a really brilliant idea, with excellent execution...
take the time to have a look. maybe think about submitting your own postcard. who knows. maybe come across someone's you think you may know.
enjoy.

-e

i am, i am superman, and i can do anything...

yea for rain! i'm always in such a better mood on cold rainy days. i'm sure that probably says something about my personality.
the plan for today: absolutely nada. it's currently 1:30p.m. and i am still sitting here in my pj's. i did a little painting this morning once i got up, and i've done a couple loads of laundry, but nothing too strenuous or demanding. i actually got up around 9:30 this morning to feed the kitties. i thought about staying up, but it's not very often that i get to sleep in with rob, so back to bed i went.
i should probably do some reading for biology since i've gotta get up extra early tomorrow to go take a test over three chapters. ugh...not looking forward to that. i'll do it later tho. i have to take advantage of days like this since they are so few and far between. it's not very often that my mood lifts this high, and i try to get as much done during that time as possible. so i am off for the day. rob is making lunch and i need to hop in the shower so we can go out for a bit later. i'm definitely feeling a starbucks run at some point. it's a perfect pumpkin spice latte kind of day :D
alright everyone...enjoy!

-e

for those hard-to-reach places, simply attach extension tube...

my ex knows something about extension tubes...if ya know what i mean...
wow...sorry...anyway
i'm at work...bored. go fig.
and with that boredom, comes a boring post, i'm sure. however, i need something other than the sounds of little photo-oners hard at work to keep me awake. so suffer with me you shall.

i've been looking at laptops online for the past few days, and i really think i'm going to get one. i was originally drooling over the apple mac books, however after taking a look and realizing that one of their models has a $300 difference depending on whether you want a black exterior or a white exterior, i kind of lost my enthusiasm for them. so then i got to looking at dell and hp, and both have a lot to offer, though i think right now i'm leaning towards hp. they seem to be a little bit better priced for what i'm going to want after customizing, so we'll see. i'm really just tired of my desktop that is over 5 years old, and even though it has been upgraded a couple of times within those five years, it really seems to be struggling these days. i have to trick it in order to get it to boot properly, and if you get too much going on at one time it likes to freeze up. i can't really complain...it's been a great computer...even if it was originally my ex's baby. my monitor is the one thing i'm going to hate to see go...i love that monitor. it's so beautiful in it's 19" of flat tube glory. i got it for free through a friend about five years ago as well, and he got if for free after taking it from work. can't complain about free. i may sell it on ebay, just to make some money off of it since it is in perfect working condition.
alas, i'm getting ahead of myself. there will be no getting rid of anything til i actually have a laptop in my posession, and that may be a little bit. here's to hopin' tho.
ok, so an hour and a half later and i'm back to actually posting this. i had to explain depth of field to dear sweet brian. we love him...he's just a little special ;)
alrighty...so, i have completely lost my train of thought and i think i'm going to go hang out in the digital lab with brian and jamie for a bit...cause that's why i get paid the big bucks.

-e

a uniform matte finish...

well, today has been an interesting one. ok, not really, at least, not in any way that would be of any interest to any of you.
i really have not felt like doing anything at all today. well, really for the past couple of weeks, but it really seemed to come to the forefront today. i didn't even get out of bed til 10:30a.m. and once i was up, it took me til nearly noon to shower and put clothes on. then i just sat around watching t.v. but not really watching it, and simply existing.
i went to my lab practical at 2. i was nearly late because of my own wonderful stupidity, but i made it, and all went well. then i came home to do more of the same mentioned earlier. my sister called around 4p.m., interrupting my existing, and we chatted for a bit. she called to thank me for her b-day gift, which ended up being a $25 gift card to kohl's. i'm really glad that something i got her is actually useful. anyway, we talked about random stuff for awhile, and then when we were done i went back to watching t.v. til nearly 5 p.m. when i had to be at work.
work was absolutely boring, however i did manage to get a lot done. i cleaned counters and stuff, which at least made me feel somewhat useful for a change. it'll make boss-man happy, which makes everyone's life easier, so i can't complain about that. then i came home and ate for really the first time all day, aside from the five donut holes and mini bag of popcorn i'd had earlier.
now i'm here, typing this, thinking about going and taking a bath or something. i should apologize for how absolutely mundane these posts have been recently. there really isn't that much excitement in my life (not that i'm complaining...i like calm), and i haven't felt like really giving life too much thought in order to make interesting, philisophical blog posts.
and on that note, i will close for the evening. enjoy your weekend, however you spend it.
later.

-e

try blending colors...

when i started this, i had some profound post in mind about something that was rather intelligent and, well...profound. needless to say, that isn't the case now.
however, it is 12:34, and that's pretty cool.

uh...oh...well, what's going in my life currently...
tomorrow i have a lab practical for biology. it covers seven units, i haven't studied, and i really haven't paid much attention in lab class, so...yeah. i'm fucked. i also have a biology lecture exam going in the testing center tomorrow thru monday morning. i have not studied for that one either, and it covers three very long chapters. go me! i'm just kickin' ass aren't i?
yeah.
no.
anyway.

i had some really funny story about how you could bury someone after murdering them and get away with it, but i can't really recall the whole thing right now. it was clever tho, i know that! perhaps next time.

it's amazing how such a small white pill can mess with one's reality. kind of freaky, but at least it makes the pain stop. and that...that is good. that is very good.
i think i tore something in my thigh playing racquetball today. it made a wonderful noise when it happened, and felt oh so fantastic. hint...that was sarcasm. it feels better now, though. mainly because i just can't feel it at all.

ok...um...oh, rob and i found a new place to live. we have one month before we move, which means i need to start packing fairly soon. it's out in the middle of nowhere, but still close enough to civilization that it's comfortable. i'm very happy with this. i really can't stand where we are living right now, and i'm really looking forward to getting the hell outta here. we're going to lose a little bit of living space in the new place, but gain a lot of storage space, which is really what we need. so, yea!

ok, well i'm out of crap to talk about now. this was a rather useless post, but i figured i should post something before people started bitching at me for no updates. i will catch y'all later.

-e

calling you...

well, i was going to take pictures of a few paintings and post them for those of you that were bugging me about them, however, the lighting in here sucks for taking pictures, and i don't feel like going to the trouble of setting up better lighting to fix that problem. i tried using the flash, but that throws the colour way off, and i can't respect myself if i do that.
today after work, rob and i went driving around looking at apartments. our lease is up at the end of november, and we are both ready to get the hell out of the place we're living now. we found a few places further north that i think we're pretty interested in checking out, and a couple west as well. we've both just been so spoiled living where we are now because we're both 5-7 minutes away from work, which is so nice. as i told rob though, i'll gladly trade the drive for peace. i want somewhere that, after a long day, i can go to and feel, well, at home. i just don't have that feeling here, and as a result i never really fully moved in. we still have boxes of stuff sitting downstairs in the dining room, and that's always just such an uneasy feeling.
work was decent today. i had very few people show up, and those that did were pleasant enough. no demanding little shits, which was nice.
oh yeah...after apartment hunting, rob and i got a bug up our butts to go play tennis since it was so nice out. so we headed over to the high school that's down the road to knock some balls around. it was a lot of fun, til i stepped wrong going after a ball, and twisted my knee badly. something snapped when it happened, and while it hurt like a bitch right after it happened, about two minutes later it was perfectly fine and felt even better than when we'd first gotten there. turns out that was just the adrenalin kicking in because that fucker is hurting like bloody hell now. i know, i'm a smart one. go me!
and on that note, i am off to take a bath and chill out for the rest of the evening. ciao!

-e

dreaming of me...

this morning i got up at 7:15a.m. in order to be at the photo lab by 8a.m. for a wonderful lab meeting. for the record, i would like to point out that, aside from the doucebag, i was the first one there. so, monster in hand, and beanie on the head i arrived with very little enthusiasm for seeing such an ungodly hour, and having to do so in such company. needless to say, i probably couldn't tell you what happened for the first twenty minutes of said meeting because i pretty much just checked out mentally. i started to realize about fifteen minutes in that i had been staring at a piece of paper on the floor the entire time mega-douce was talking. meh...if i missed something important it would be the first time that man had anything important to say, so i think i'll live.
i'm tired. also, i'm on painkillers, and that is beautiful. after not having taken my darvocet for about three months, i had forgotten it's magical powers that i simply adore. the past two days are a bit foggy, but it's a trade off for the pure relief of being able to walk up and down stairs in less than ten minutes one way. plus, people tend to like me better when i'm on 'em...i'm nicer because nothing matters.
i did some painting after i got home from work. i had been messing with one off and on all day, and when i got home i finished it, so yay. ok...i'm typing with my eyes closed at this point because i'm coming off meds, so i think i'm gonna go take something and then ehad to bed. much love to all fuckers. later!

-e

It's easier to leave than to be left behind...

the title is an rem lyric...anyway...
per my therapists' request, i took along with me today four of my most recent paintings. this is a really big deal if you know me because i do not tend to allow others to view my work. let's just say, i'm not my biggest fan.
after pulling them out, my therapist says, ok, so what do they mean. and i thought about it..."uh, nothing really..." i said. and it hit me...that's pretty much true, or i've at least convinced myself of it. i went on to explain that my art doesn't start and stop with a specific purpose in mind, or some raw emotion i felt the need to get out, but that it's really more for the viewer to get whatever they want out of it.
ok, just a hint...wrong answer! never tell your therapist, the one that you pay to analyze you already, that your art is free for the assessment as well.
so she goes on to talk about the biggest of the four pieces, and explains how it makes her sad (as does everything in my life honestly) because it's so dark and there's this image of a door hidden within it, but that the darkness of it was depressing.
ok...so...yeah. there is actually something of resemblence of a door in the painting, but it only started out as that, and then got painted over so many times, and while it still shows through, it's not really that i meant anything by it. i didn't bother to tell her any of that, however, because the last thing i figured i needed was to hear about whether or not the door was opened or closed. she started down that road and i just kept her moving through the paintings.
after having gone through all four of them, and having to explain who rothko is, i was worn out. she sat there and gave me her evaluation on each one individually, and as i sat there once she was done, i realized that she had been fairly dead on with the first one. however, the other three she was way off...but i wasn't about to admit that there's any meaning behind anything i put out there.
and i'm still not. nope. dammit.
the rest of the session we talked about tons of other stuff...well, she did, i just sat there being all walled up and conveying some sense of control. then she said in response to some logical, unemotional answer i spouted off that i, "should just do math..." and it's then that i started to realize that i wasn't really paying much attention through most of the session. i was thinking about my art. not just painting, but photography, writing, drawing, painting...everything, and how i'm so absolutely afraid of putting myself out there for people to see. i don't want there to be meaning behind my work, because that makes it too real.
i started thinking about how everything i've done in photography over the past year has been so sterile. very little of what i've photographed has had any meaning. i think my photo I final was probably the one thing i've done that had any kind of emotion behind it. my paintings reveal more than my photography, and my writing even more so, and when it comes down to it, none are that great nor meaningful.
so what does all of this mean? i don't know. it means i'm really reconsidering my life at this point and where it's heading. i don't know that photography/art is really where i should be going. unless i want to just do sterile news photography for a paper/magazine somewhere, and, to me, that just defeats the purpose of having the degree.
anyway. uh...so yeah. i got interrupted and lost my train of thought, so i think i will just end this post now.
lost is on in an hour.
later.

-e

madder than i've been in awhile...

every two weeks, on wednesday at 3p.m. i go to therapy. this is basically unheard of in my family, but whatever. i'm tired of being unhappy, so i started going about a month and a half ago. so today my appointment got switched to 2p.m. for whatever reason. i went, spent my $75, heard about how i'm too logical, and left with raised blood pressure and an anger i haven't felt in awhile.
however, i did refuse to do another damn collage. flat out refused.
so, then i drove to michael's where i spent $60 on more paint supplies to make myself feel better.
i'm now home, and still fuming.
the best part of it all is...i have no freaking clue as to why i am so angry!!!!!!!
ARGH!

ok, anyway. i'll be fine. that's what paint is for. gonna go. catch ya later.

-e

umph...

so today was a rather fulfilling day. i got to actually play a little in racquetball, bitch about work with a co-worker or two, and got home in time for dr. phil! sweet! i also went to michael's today for more canvas, and ended up spending $40! oops! oh well. i'm sure it was all needed ;)
i have actually been fairly productive in the painting world lately. i completed two more paintings, one of which i had been working on for two weeks off and on. i started two more today, and i think i'm done with one. the other one is in a bit of a mess right now, so we'll have to see where it goes from here. i bought these really awesome water based, acid-free markers to experiment with, but the only problem is that they don't like to dry completely. so when i went to paint over it, the marker smeared, but currently i really like how it's turning out...i dunno. i'm so "if-fy" on that stuff.
rob and i watched another episode of 'heroes' tonite. it was pretty good. i'm hooked at this point mainly because i just want to see where they're taking it, not because it's a brilliant show or anything. it's just paced rather odd and is very incongruent (haha, i used a math term. i rule).
alrighty, well i'm gonna paint some more and then go snuggle up in bed. rob wasn't feeling well earlier, so he's already there. anyway. nite y'all.

-e

going through the archives...

so i decided to take a look back at some of my past bloggings, mainly for discretion purposes since my sister has access to this thing now ;) anyway, i came across some things that i found funny, and thought i would give some commentary on them in their current status:


December 08, 2005
rob found out today that someone he called a friend for the past six or seven years was in town recently and actually called one of their mutual friends to go hang out, but yet, we never heard from him.

• just recently, this same friend, or ex-friend of rob's sent out wedding invitations for his upcoming, well, wedding, and of course rob and i did not receive one. however, the mutual friend mentioned above did receive one. yeah...we're still not missing him.

December 15, 2005
however, the last time she went to the vet, we took macaroni as well, and found out that they weigh exactly the same amount. fine and dandy right? wrong...mac is 8 years old and fully grown, whereas booger is 6 months old and still has quite a bit of growing to do.

• well booger is now over a year old and, while she really doesn't seem to be very big, weighs 12 pounds. macaroni hasn't gained an ounce.

December 17, 2005
we bought the movie American Splendor the other day, so i may make rob watch that

• we have still to this day never watched this movie. i don't think it's ever even been opened in all honesty.

January 01, 2006
so, as usual, i won't be taking part in the whole making resolutions ordeal. or, maybe i will....yeah...i hearby make the resolution to continue hating most of society, people in general, and the criteria by which we are made to live.

• sweet...i've managed to hold true to this resolution 110%. i rock!

January 10, 2006
oh yeah! i also bought a guitar and got it in over the weekend. i ended up going with this one...(link) it's pretty sweet, and my fingers totally hurt from playing so much.

• i haven't played that poor guitar in probably over six months...it's sitting right here lookin' real pretty tho!

anyway...just some updates on past updates. this was basically a sad excuse for a post when i had nothing better to post about. however, i enjoyed the look back, and i know most of you are too lazy to go through the archives, and i really can't blame you. so i have work in the morning, and racquetball in the afternoon which i will not be able to participate in, but i still gotta show up. so with that i bid you a good nite.

-e

p.s. - to one whom i know doesn't read this, but might per-chance. happy f'in birthday doucebag. i'm sure i mean that with love.

and now for some clarification...

i feel the need to clarify some seemingly misconstrued information from previous posts that have been brought into question recently.
i am not mad at anyone. there are some people in my life right now that i have been a shit to, but there is more than one, and singling someone out does not change that fact. i'm sorry if you guys feel bad for that one person, but just realize that you don't know all the facts, and that i have my reasons for being this way.
i hope this clears shit up so that no further interrogations are necessary, not that they weren't funny or sweet or anything. :)
later!

-e

happy birthday mommy...

today my mom turns 66 years old. no, i'm not kidding. rob and i are going to g-ville today to spend time with her, and take her out for lunch and what not.
my sister, who turned 28 yesterday, and her boyfriend will be joining us as well, so it should at least prove to be an interesting affair.
my sister and i have never really been close. we look a bit alike in some ways, we sound a hell of a lot alike, and we both have boyfriends over 30, however that's pretty much where our simularities end. she's older, i'm younger; she's short, i'm tall; she parties, i'm anti-social; she has tons of friends, and again i'm anti-social; she has a bachelor's in biology, i'm the artsy fartsy one doing photography; she's book smart but has to work really hard at things like school, i'm life smart and don't have to work hard for very much at all; she's my dad's child, whereas i am my mom's.
our differences are pretty much limitless. if she's one thing, you can bet that i am the exact polar opposite. it's been that way since we were kids. unfortunately, it caused problems in school, because she had all of my teachers four years before me, so by the time i reached them they had these preconceived notions of who i was supposed to be, and boy did they get a suprise when they realized how wrong they were.
anyway...this post was mainly just to say happy birthday to my mommy and to my sister!
later!

-e

but i've got my philosophy, keeps my feet on the ground...

so i'm here at work on a beautiful saturday when i could be outside actually improving my life in non-monetary ways that would benefit me in so many other ways than $7 an hour will. epiphany? perhaps, but it always comes back to needing that damn dollar.
at least saturdays are quiet. i have no one bugging me continuously for shit they should be learning in class. i get so tempted sometimes to tell the little fuckers that when they want to start paying me a teachers salary, i'll start wanting to help them, but until then they can just fuck off. however, none of that today thank goodness. saturdays are usually filled with the dedicated students who know what the hell they're doing in a darkroom, and don't need someone there to hold their hand every step of the way. i respect those kids...well, i at least endure them.
anyway.
so i've been a real shit to some people lately, and without really giving them any reason whatsoever. why? oh, i'm sure i have my reasons. however, i really wasn't aware of what, exactly, those reasons were until just recently. does this mean i'm going to sit here and hash out my shit on a blog? or that i'm going to apologize for being a shit? or that i'm going to actually explain my reasons to those select few i've been a shit to?
in short...no.
does that make me an even bigger shit for admitting i now know why i've been a shit and yet will still not release that information?
probably.
do i care?
not at this point. but i will...maybe.
i've decided i have to talk to someone outside of the issues first. as i told someone last nite, that's why i pay someone to listen to me talk, so they can figure my shit out for me. it's not like i'm an idiot, i mean, i know what the problem is, and i know why i'm approaching it the way i am, and i know what i'm trying to accomplish in doing so. however, while it may take care of the problem from one end, it doesn't solve it altogether for me, and until i can explain it all to someone that i don't really care about, it will remain unresolved, and i will continue to go on being a shit. and no one wants that now do they? i didn't think so.
anyway, there are people in my lab so i must go.

e

we're all the same, unless we're special...

so this week starts the beginning of new shows, well, other than lost which starts next week, but that's not the point. the point is, there are a lot of new shows on this season, and while most of them don't appeal to me or rob at all, there is one that i'm afraid i may easily become addicted to.
it's a show on nbc on monday nites called 'heroes'. now, the show was running up against a wall for me because monday nites wwe raw is on (dork, i know) which gets priority over all others, and with both shows starting at the same time, i was almost ready to give up on the show before i even saw it. however, rob went ahead and set up the vcr (yes, i know, twenty first century and all and we still use a vcr; we're proud).
so tuesday nite i don't have anything to watch, so last nite we sat down and watched the show, and while it definitely has a 'lost'-esque feel to it, the show is, as far as premieres go, really well done. it definitely has potential to say the least.
so that's my dork post for right now. i was going to say for the week, but we all know that's probably not true.
subject change:
so i actually went to classes today which is good. i still don't feel all that great, but i talked myself into going, and it's a damn good thing since we had a test in my bcis class. oops oops oops. oh well, that crap is easy and i'm sure i did fine, so whatever. it's funny how everyone in that class absolutely hates our teacher. i must say, he is definitely a strange one, but whatever. it's not like i have to deal with him. i just show up for class, do my work and go home. simple enough.
i also finished another painting today. not that it's really important or anything, but it has been awhile, so yeah. i have like, three other ones to still finish, but that probably won't happen for awhile. it's not so smart to start three or four paintings simultaneously really, but that's usually just how i work. i have to keep my mind working, and if i have to think about what to do with one painting next, i take that time to start or work on or finish another one. as boring as my life is, my brain is surely not. i swear it never slows down. it's a curse at times, but fairly beneficial at others, so i guess it balances itself out.
wow, so i'm rambling now, and dr. phil is about to come on, so i'm gonna go. two and a half more days til the weekend! later!

-e

sorry doesn't fix it, and i'm tired of hearing it...

so i've been fairly frustrated with life lately. between being sick and not knowing what's wrong with me, having people in my life who don't seem capable of being able to make good decisions and choices in their own lives, and school and work being just whatever...well, yeah...frustrating.
i got told today that a friend doesn't want me to feel like i have to babysit her. my response was that someone needs to since she's not making great choices for herself. however, now that i'm thinking about it, i agree. i'm not going to babysit her. fuck it. i'm not going to give my opinions nor advice anymore, and on the other side of it i'm not giving my sympathy for the shit that happens to her. so i'm done with that. my life is too stressful in it's own regard to have to worry about others. that's why i stopped having friends in the first place.
i mean for freakin real people. i've been to the doctor four three times in the past three weeks. i've been on five different medications, as well as not being able to take my pain medication for my knees and hip problems because it interferes with everything else i'm taking. i've had two blood tests, a diabetes test, and two chest x-rays. next they want to do a full abdominal cat scan, which means a lot of money, and from there they possibly want to hospitalize me. goody.
so on top of all of that i'm supposed to worry about someone doing shit and getting hurt because of choices and decisions that they make and are completely responsible for? i'm really supposed to care even though it was something completely avoidable?
i just can't.
maybe that makes me a bad person, maybe i'm a bad friend or insensitive to whatever, but that's for everyone else to decide for themselves. i know i'm not a bad person nor a bad friend, however people will think as they want to, and i cannot, nor will not try to control that.
i really didn't mean for this to turn into such a rant, but it's been bugging me for awhile now, so i guess i just needed to get it out there. i won't apologize for my words, but i'll apologize for the time it took to read this crap.
anyway, have a good week to everyone. later.

-e

it may be necessary to tap bolts in place with a hammer...

so it's monday and..(drum roll please)..i still feel like shit. yay.

however, in good news, it's cooler outside, and while my knees are bitching, the rest of me is quite happy! i love it when the weather starts to cool down and the air smells so crisp. mmm, makes me happy. now if only i lived somewhere where fall actually exists as a completely seperate season. that would make me very happy.

i didn't go to class today...i know, i'm bad. i had all the intentions of doing so, however once i got to the school i was drained of all energy and thought i would have to spend my afternoon in the photo lab because even walking was a chore. oh well. no big deal.

i think i may spend the rest of my afternoon painting and sleeping, and maybe not in that order. or maybe i'll just sleep because that sounds damn good right now. i shouldn't tho. if i take a nap now i won't sleep tonite. wow, sorry, thinking out loud. that was boring.

ok, so i'm gonna go do something now that isn't this. hope everyone's weekend was good and i will catch y'all later!

-e

adventures in modern medicine...

so i'm alive, for now i suppose.
i went to the doctor again today, and he still doesn't know what's wrong with me. he did a chest x-ray and found no masses like absesses or tumors, but he also pointed out that the absess in my stomach after my appendix burst didn't show up on x-ray either. so that's reassuring. so he put me on new medication and said that if it doesn't help by monday that i would probably need to get a full abdominal cat scan which may or may not reveal anything.
in other news i feel like shit.
oh wait, i said other news...uh...booger is conked out on my floor under the stool looking absolutely adorable.
argh, anyway...i'm freaking exhausted so i think i'm going to go retrieve rob from his video game and make him go cuddle with me in bed. tmi, i know. anyway. nite all.

-e

hi ho hi ho work sucks don't chya know...

so i realize that i haven't updated in awhile, thank you very much! however, i have been extremely ill, and still am in all honesty. my doctor doesn't know what's wrong with me which, from past experience, is *not* a good thing. rob is all freaked out, my mom thinks i'm dieing. me? i just feel like shit.
anyway. i'm at work currently, listening to some of the dullest conversations between some of the dullest people. my lower back is throbbing, and i feel like i could sleep for a decade. the joys of working in the school's photography lab is, i don't do anything! thus, why i'm writing this.
my pseudo-boss and i got into it today. a very heated conversation took place that i commanded for the most part. i basically told him that he needed to grow some balls and say shit to my face rather than hide behind emails and other people. we're "having a team meeting" next week supposedly, but that really just means he's going to go home and cry about it and lick his wounds like a beaten dog. hahahahahaha :)
uh...so yeah, that's really it. i have a doctor's appointment in the wonderful world of greenville tomorrow, so that should be fun. i'm honestly just hoping that he hospitalizes me and figures out what the hell is going on, however, i'm sure he'll just send me home with some new medicine to try and say, "now call me monday if you're not feeling any better." that's what he's said the past two times i've been in the past two weeks.
anyway...there's a fight going on in the lab or something, so i guess i should go be switzerland for a bit. hope this fulfills your need for an update.
later!

-e

previous post mistake...

ok, so i was just going through some of my old posts and i came across the one titled "who am i" in which i stated:
"i am bad with all emotions other than love."


correction...i am bad with *all* emotions...especially love.

that is all.

-e

i'm at a loss for clever titles...

went to see my mommy today. rob and i took her to lunch, and she sent us home with yummy peach cake. it's absolutely delicious.
so i continue to feel like crap. the antibiotic isn't doing anything other than making me feel worse because it's too strong for me to handle. argle bargle. i have to start taking it at nites so i can sleep through the naseau, assuming i *can* sleep through it.
so not a lot else is going on. i had the wonderful realization this weekend that every weekend from now til the end of the semester is going to suck balls. basically i get one day off a week, and it's the craptastical day of sunday. ya know, the day when all the crazy people go out, everything closes early (if it's even open to begin with), and dammit, it used to be my pajama wearin, video game playin day! now it's the day when i have to cram everything i would normally do on saturday into twelve hours or so on sunday. yeah. not cool.
so, on that note, i'm sitting here trying to figure out meals for the rest of the week, what i'm going to cook and when, etc... then i've gotta do some laundry before it gets too much later if i want to have anything to wear for the rest of the week. and i'm sure i have homework that i'm forgetting about, but who cares. i refuse to stress over that at this point. i would really like to work on a painting tonite too, but i don't know if i'm really feeling up to it. i just feel bad because it's been over a week since i did any painting.
ok, so anyway. i'm going to get this crap finished and then go to bed so i can get up tomorrow and start another week from hell. later fuckers.

-e

periodic re-tightening of wing nuts will assure a sturdy product...

so i feel like shit. found out yesterday that i have a lung infection. go me. go figure.
anyways. i haven't been to a single class today (which is bad because friday's are my long days and i really shouldn't miss), and i'm questioning whether or not to even try going to work tonite.
ugh. anyway.
in other news, i have decided that emotions are crap and i think i would be a lot better off without them, so i'm just not going to even bother anymore. it makes life a lot simpler, and that's what i need. i used to not have emotions, and then somewhere along the way someone broke me or something and i haven't been able to get rid of the damn things since. however, i have reached my breaking point, and i think this would be a good time to get rid of them once again. so, from now on, if it can't be rationalized and it's not logical, then it just doesn't exist. it goes along with how i've chosen to label myself lately...i'm religiously agnostic, orientation agnostic, politically agnostic, etc... so why not just make my entire life agnostic? seems to make perfect sense to me. indifference is the key my friends. if you just don't care, then it can't effect you at all.
now given. this will last all of a week, and then something will happen and who the fuck knows, but i like the ideology of it. and dammit, that's all that matters really. i do realize, for those of you still actually reading at this point, that i am just nonsensically rambling and saying absolutely nothing of any importance right now, however, i probably just don't care. see? it works so beautifully. however, my stomach does care that i am sitting up for this long, so i am going to go lie back down now and watch horrible day time t.v.
ta ta

-e

grey days calm my mind...

so, it rained today. yay. it was a good day. i did absolutely nothing. well...nothing of any great importance or anything. i did some laundry, i went through cookbooks and made a shopping list, i played fable for almost three hours, i had some chai-black-and green tea mix that was amazing, and i watched monday nite raw. that's it, that was my day. oh, i called my mom too. i'm a good kid like that.
unfortunately, real life starts back tomorrow, and i must answer to it. that means work at 10:30, and class at 1. i know, not a real big deal or anything, just a pain in the ass. i'm hoping my new glasses come in tomorrow, but i have a feeling it will be wednesday before i see them. oh wow, pun definitely not intended.
so now i have to go to the store with rob so that we actually have food to eat this week. we're trying to start cooking again because it's cheaper and healthier, and i really need to lose some weight. even my mom thinks so, and that's never a good sign. i'm supposed to go to the doctor sometime this week, but i don't see that happening because i have no idea when i would have the time to get over there. meh, maybe next week. no biggie.
anyway. i'm off to go on our late nite grocery shopping spree. have a good week.

-e

R.e.m. - Sad Professor...

If we're talking about love
Then I have to tell you
Dear readers, I'm not sure where I'm headed.
I've gotten lost before.
I've woke up stone drunk
Face down in the floor.

Late afternoon, the house is hot.
I started, I jumped up.
Everyone hates a bore.
Everybody hates a drunk.

This may be a lit invention
Professors muddled in their intent
To try to rope in followers
To float their malcontent.
As for this reader,
I'm already spent.

Late afternoon, the house is hot.
I started, I jumped up.
Everyone hates a sad professor.
I hate where I wound up.

Dear readers, my apologies.
I'm drifting in and out of sleep.
Long silence presents the tragedies
Of love. Not the age. Get afraid.
The surface hazy with attendant thoughts.
A lazy eye metaphor on the rock.

Late afternoon, the house is hot.
I started, I jumped up.
Everyone hates a bore.
Everybody hates a drunk.
Everyone hates a sad professor.
I hate where I wound up.
I hate where I wound up.

update biatches...

so this past week has been hell. here are the highlights:

the good:

• school started, which is good because the sooner it starts is the sooner it ends. i like most of my classes too.
• starbucks has their seasonal drinks back, which means pumpkin spice latte! w00t!
• i didn't have to see gary (the fill in lab manager/my pseudo boss) this week.
• no one i know died.
• it rained early in the week, and is showing signs of doing so again.
• i got paid.
• i bought new clothes.
• i got to hang out with friends.
• i got to hear lupita curse...a lot.

the bad:

• school started, and i like most of my classes except for biology lab. it can kiss my grits.
• while starbucks does have their pumpkin spice latte back, i cannot drink it because it hurts my tummy, and we think i may have an ulcer.
• i did have to work thursday nite, which blew balls.
• somone i know did get hurt.
• it rained, and might rain again, which means my knees have been killing me.
• i got paid, but not in time to get it deposited before the holiday weekend. woohoo.
• i bought new clothes, which means i spent money.
• there's nothing really bad about getting to hang out with friends. except for maybe when they are going through shit that i can't necessarily help with, or when they don't want my help.
• while hearing lupita curse is always entertaining, it sucks that she was as upset and frustrated as she was. i've never heard her get that emphatic with her anger, and it upset me because i care.

everything else:

• i can't say that i really know what the next four months are going to be like, but it should be interesting to say the least. i mentioned above that i might have an ulcer, and if so, it's bound to be totally due to stress. school, work, and life have all been one big mess lately, and while i'm still on track and handling them all fairly well, it has definitely taken a toll on my body and mind.
• work starts for real next week, and classes will be really getting into the swing of things, but until them i plan on enjoying my three day weekend, because it really could not have come at a better time in my opinion.
• now, if i could only find a new hoodie...

hope all is well in the world. that's all for now from me. rob's home with da food. later!

-e

and you got a secret I can’t keep...

so i've really started to like the goo goo dolls more and more lately. the station i created on pandora plays a lot of their stuff and their lyrics are just really meaningful. not necessarily in any kind of deep way, but i like 'em. the title is from a song called 'think about me' by them. it was on when i started typing this, so there ya go.

anyway. today was the first day of classes, and it went pretty smoothly. books are going to cost me a small fortune, but i need to go sell my old ones first so that will help out a bit i suppose. i really like my psychology class, and my biology lecture class seems to be ok. my bcis (business computer information systems) class on the other hand is taught by a man that barely speaks english, and it's in a lecture room...with no computers...i was very confused.

i had to go speak with the dean of fine arts today as well regarding my job situation. i have to go back tomorrow after my raquetball class for another meeting. so i'll more of an update on that after that meeting.

so i got stuck on this painting i've been fucking with for the past week or so. i worked on it a bit a little bit ago before i got on here, but now i'm stuck again. i thought that maybe the rain would help out some, but there's just been too much shit going on i guess, and my drip drops of creativity have dried up for the time being i suppose.

anyway. i'm going to go i suppose. i'm actually being useful and doing laundry, so i should go check on that and stuff. later!

-e

lotus

Hey hey.Hey hey.I was hell.Sarcastic silver swell.That day it rainedTough spun. Hard won. NoOcean flower aquariumBadlands, give a hand.Honey dipt. Flim flamHey hey. Hey hey.That cat can walk like a big bad man.So happy to show usI ate the lotus.Say haven't you noticed?I ate the lotusStorefront window, I reflect.Just last week I was merely heckTip the scale. I was hellPicked me up, then I fell.Who's this stranger? Crowbar spine...(die die die) and I feel fine.Let it rain, rain, rainBring my happy back again.So happy to show usI ate the lotus.Say haven't you noticed?I ate the lotusI ate the lotusLet it rain, rain, rainSave me from myself againWash away my ugly sinsOpposing thumb, dorsal finThat monkey died for my grinBring my happy back againLet it rain, rain, rainBring my happy back again.So happy to show usI ate the lotus.Say haven't you noticed?I ate the lotusI ate the lotusI ate the lotusI ate the lotus.

preparing, processing...

updates huh? let's see...

life has been...well...not boring lately, that's for sure. too much stress. too much going on really.
tomorrow starts fall semester classes, and i went and bought a new backpack today. yay me! well, ok, really rob bought the backpack, but still. aside from that, i also got new glasses that i have to wait a week for, but i did finally find some that i like. they're nothing fancy, just better than what i have now.

work has been absolute crap, and i don't know that i still have a job there or not really. more importantly, i don't know that i *want* to still have a job there. i just hate to leave kelley and des by themselves...or more realistically, just kelley because i don't think des is going to stay, but i don't know.

as for this summer it's been different. i can't say i did anything too terribly exciting, because it was mostly filled with school and work. however, it is probably one that i will never forget, so i guess that says something.

anyway. i don't really have much else to update on. you go demanding updates and you forget that it's different...i'm boring! later!

-e

all in a days work...

so i have today and tomorrow off of work, which would normally be really awesome, however, here i sit, bored and blank.
i want to start a new painting, but i need to go to michael's to get an easel since i bought some pre-stretched 16x20 canvas that i have nowhere to paint on. i was supposed to go get my eyes checked and get new glasses today but they were closed for lunch when rob and i went to get it done, so now it'll be tomorrow before that gets done. everything gets put off til tomorrow, nothing ever gets taken care of when it's supposed to in my world.
i was telling rob earlier that i need a vacation. i need a week off from the world to just get away from everything and everyone. i would get too bored really, but it still sounds nice. won't happen though, since i work this week and school starts next week. so for the next four months i am a slave to the forces that are quad c. woo-freakin-hoo. then again, once school starts i get my cushy desk job back and i won't have to be cleaning, moving and inventorying shit in the lab anymore.
ok, well i guess i'm done. suhweet.

-e

when everything's made to be broken, i just want you to know who i am...

so this weekend has been...interesting, but good nonetheless.

unfortunately, tomorrow i have to go back to work, and that blows goats for quarters. i've also gotta go get new glasses this week because mine are just not cutting it anymore. having astigmatisms in both eyes is a real pain in the ass...or eye i suppose. so optical clinic is having a special for an eye exam and two pairs of glasses for $88 which is sweet, and i've been there before, so that's cool. i like the idea of having two different frames so i can get one in something fun like maybe a cool shade of red or something, and then get the other pair in something normal.

wow, that was rather boring wasn't it? yeeeeeeeeah.

so i've gotta go to my mom's house in greenville here in a little bit for dinner. i try to go one sunday a month just to spend some time with her. i'm dragging rob along though i don't really think he wants to go. meh, whatever.

i'm listening to 'Iris' by the goo goo dolls right now...i love this song. the lyrics just make a lot of sense to me.

alrighty, well, i guess i should stop writing before i start talking about the weather outside or the dallas cowboys or something as stereotypical. later!

-e

blatent advertisement...

so i've been meaning to post this for awhile now, and since i have nothing better to talk about, i'll post it now.
this is totally going to ruin my reputation (yeah right...what reputation?:) and make me sound so totally girly but:

i absolutely love dove products. it started with their deodarant...the cool moisture line. then i got their shampoo and conditioner because it doesn't contain something i'm allergic to. then i started getting their leave in conditioner, mousse, and gel. and just the other day i bought their face wash (also in the cool moisture line.)

now, i hate the dove commercials where they use "average" or "normal" looking women to sell their products, because really...who wants to look at some fatty in her underwear? oh wow, that sounded bad...but then again, it's true. alls i'm sayin is, i kinda enjoy the whole advertising scheme of, "if you buy our products you too can look like an exotic supermodel that everyone wants to fuck." yes? no? maybe it's just me...hmm....

anyway. i should totally get kickbacks for this post. just a thought.
later!

-e

a much better day...

yay. today was actually decent! finally!
i didn't get up til nearly 11:00a.m., and then i only got up in order to run up to the school and turn my timesheet in for work so i can get paid this month. then i came home, ate some lunch, and chilled on the computer for awhile.
i painted for a bit, and threw some laundry in, and then des came over to drop off a disc that she had burned for me. (thanks again honky! i so totally appreciate it!:)
she ended up hanging out for quite awhile, which was totally awesome even though i swear we didn't do much other than sit on the couch and make fun of each other. good times, good times.
then rob came home, and des left (completely unrelated to rob coming home...i think ;) and rob had been having a bad day, so he vented and we went and got food, where the stupid people at wendy's can't seem to read monitors and get my order right. but nonetheless, we got home with our food, sat down and watched monday nite RAW.
now i'm sitting here trying to figure out what to do with my latest painting, and rob is downstairs playing a video game (shadow of the colossus or something to that extent) and waiting for me to come down and watch. it's sad that that sounds sexual isn't it. yeah.
alrighty, well i unfortunately have to work tomorrow, so i'm going to go do some more laundry so i actually have clothes to wear, and then i'm gonna chill the rest of the nite. that's all folks!

-e

on a more positive note...

wow...so yeah, sorry about that last post. goin through some shit if you couldn't tell.
anyway.
on the brighter side of life, i got an 'a' in speech class and a 'b' in government! w00t! i was very happy.
oh, and i finished a painting that i think i actually really like. so fuck y'all if you don't. i don't care :)

what else...oh, we bought season 3 of the: "lois and clark: adventures of superman" series, which rocks. we've done quite a bit this weekend amidst my frustrations and emotional crap.

and now for something funny:
i fell down the stairs earlier. it was quite comical looking i'm sure. and the yelp i let out even i had to laugh at. however, i managed to hyper-extend my left arm as i frantically grabbed at the railing. yeah, it hurts really bad, but all the same i can't help but laugh. i'll probably be in a sling the next few days because of it, which really make the whole thing that much funnier. plus, i told rob that it was going to sound real good me saying, "oh what this? oh, it's nothing. no really, i just fell down the stairs." he didn't find that as funny as i did, but ya know, to each his own.
alrighty, well before this turns all melodramatic again i'm gonna go. catch ya fuckers later.

-e

i've had a bad week...

so...yeah, the title pretty much says it all. this past week was probably the most stressful i've had in a looong time.
the week ended in me literally having a nervous breakdown, and crying in front of people i barely even know on thursday. yeah. go me. friday i spent with des, but i was so emotionally drained i'm sure i wasn't much fun to be around, but i still had a good time.
at least summer semesters are done with. one less thing to stress over. now if i could just get everything else under control.
anyway. i'm a mess right now, and i'm just having to deal with it. so please excuse me for the next little bit. it'll pass i'm sure. always does.
i've been painting all day. not sure why. i suck, for real, but it's calming. i just sit in my room/office, listening to crappy music, with the door shut, and painting all day. booger comes in and annoys me from time to time, but mostly i just use the time to chill out and be alone. plus, it helps with getting stuff out when i don't have the words to say, the energy to say it, or the right person to say it to.
i'm tired, but i don't feel like sleeping. i'm in mood where i want to just go. pack a bag and leave. leave it all behind for the world to deal with and figure out for itself. but i can't, and i won't, and that sucks almost more than the want itself.
i thought i had this all under control. what happened? i don't deal well with stress and feelings, especially both together. it becomes too much, and it already has. too much.
i'm rambling now. i love you. maybe i don't. no, i just wish i didn't. that's it. yeah. you piss me off so freakin much, that i can't even comprehend why i care so much. why do i care? why should i care? it's not like you do. not anymore anyway. which, by the way, thanks for that. whatever...why do i even bother. argh.
i shouldn't even post this, but i will because i have nothing better to do with this dumb blog. it's all crap anyway.
later.

an unusually apathetic and, what some might call "emo", post...

well here i am. not sure why. i got done typing up my speech outline for a speech i have to give tomorrow. it's about how to process black and white film. yeah. woo-freakin-hoo.
then i spent half an hour painting. why is it the stuff that i paint that i actually like, no one else seems to like, and the stuff that i don't necessarily think is that great is the stuff everyone else loves and goes crazy over? it's shit. oh well. it's not done yet, so maybe it'll get good by the time it is finished. -shrug-
i'm really...unsettled right now. have been for most of the nite. earlier in the evening i was fine, but then the shift happened, and here i sit. i didn't even notice the shift til a little while after it happened, and by then my good mood was too far gone to retrieve.

to you:
i need to talk to you. in person. and soon. i don't even know how often you stop by here to read this, but hopefully you'll see this. sorry about the message i left earlier, i don't want to get you in trouble, but i do need to talk to you about stuff, and i can't do it over the phone because that's not good enough. so i'll meet you somewhere, somehow, whenever you can, or i'll come pick you up, or whatever! but soon. please.

tomorrow is going to be stressful, and it's well after midnight, and i guess i should go to bed. i really shouldn't have had that doubleshot when i got home from work. later.

caffienated and confused...

so this week has been insane. i swear, i will be so much happier once summer II is over. there just aren't enough hours in the day for me to get everything i need to do, done, and everything i want to do, even started. i dunno. i'm rambling. anyway.
so i just got done watching a movie titled, "Imagine Me and You". uh, wow. yeah. i'm broken. all i can say is, watch it. hm...
in other parts of my life, absolutely nothing is going on. i started painting again. it's something i really enjoy, and even though i'm probably horrible to it, i like to think i'm ok. i do abstract, though, so it's easy to say, "oh, i meant for it to be like that," when it really probably is screwed up ;) ya know, kinda like digital photography... ooooooooooh, i'm gonna get my ass kicked for that one :D
i have to write a script for speech class, write a speech, study for a speech test, and study for government all before monday. yeah...that's not going to happen. here's what i predict will happen. i'll write the script and maybe start on the speech tomorrow, the studying won't get done until monday nite and i'll take the test at the last possible moment on tuesday, government i won't even think about again until wednesday, and thursday are finals. sounds good to me! yay for a stressful life! at least i'm not in denial.
well, i think i'm going to go grab my coke-black, set up my paints and start messin around again. ya know, since tomorrow is going to be chock full of homework and what not ;) oh, and i think des and i are supposed to hang out, though i'm not sure if that's still the plan or not. if you happen to read this, lemme know! otherwise i'll just give you a call tomorrow at some point. okie doke, i'm done. later!

yattie yattie yattie...

so this weekend has been pretty tame.
friday was mostly calm, with a few bumps along the way. yesterday, rob and i spent most of the day chilled out, and then went to g-ville to have dinner with my mom. that was fun. today, i haven't even gotten out of my jammies. i figured that my superman boxers and ren and stempy shirt (in non-coordinating shades of blue) would suit me just fine for the days activities. and so they have. i have finished a load of laundry, watched t.v., played guitar a little bit (or at least attempted to until my fingers just refused to bend in certain ways and i got frustrated), played games on addictinggames.com, and just got done painting or priming a piece of canvas to use later on once it's dried. it's an awesome shade of grey-ish blue.
i love to paint. i'm not so great at it, and you would definitely refer to my work as 'abstract', but i nonetheless love to spend my time creating masterpieces and messes all at the same time. :) as far as liking certain painters goes, i would have to say that my favorite, by far, is rothko, followed closely by monet.
in other news, booger woke us up about five times this morning as she attempted and at some points suceeded to get into the bathroom cabinets. we believe she was looking for her new toy that we purchased for her a couple days ago. it's a little green mouse with a super furry tale and a bell attached to it. well, with the bell being on the outside it makes it a "supervised playtime only toy" which means she can't have it when we are not at home, or when we're sleeping (for fear of her swallowing the bell). so we always put all of those types of toys in the bathroom, usually in the cabinets above the toilet where she can't reach, however, we think she was trying to be clever and looking for them anyway.
ok, long story with not much payoff, but at least it's something dammit!
i'm tired. and bored. i think i may go bug rob for a bit. he's on the phone with his mommy, so that will be fun. ok, that's all. later!